


you'll be okay

by xxpaynoxx



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, and yes i used Sirius's Speech from HP, let me live, this is just fluff basically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-18 01:10:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5892322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxpaynoxx/pseuds/xxpaynoxx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Obikin Day 3: Tears</p><p>
  <strike>I'm finally doing Obikin week :)</strike>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	you'll be okay

“You’ve been crying.”

“Jedi don’t cry.”

Obi-wan entered the room, padding softly on the carpet as he approached Anakin. The boy was facing away from him, the moonlight from the wide windows surrounding him turning his skin silver and making him look like a god. His shoulders were shaking as he ran his hands through his short hair, his Padawan braid hanging limply next to his neck. 

“That’s not true, and you know it,” Obi-wan remarked as he sat down, and a pang of hurt echoed through his heart as Anakin purposefully looked away from him, as tense as a spring. But as soon as Obi-wan laid his hand on his shoulder, he felt him relax and a choked sob clawed its way out of his throat as he leaned his head onto his Master’s shoulder.

“It’s just my mom, I miss her  _ so much _ and…I’m so mad at myself because I couldn’t save her. How can I possibly be the Chosen One and not be able to save anyone? I feel like such a failure, Master, and I…I’m trying to repress my feelings like you told me but I don’t know how long I’m going to be able to take this anymore.”

Obi-wan was left speechless. He had never really thought about Anakin’s emotions before, maybe because he had placed his own under restraint so well. He had never given a wink of thought to how Anakin was holding up after being taken from his mother, and now that he noticed how barbaric this seemed, he inwardly winced.

“You are not all-powerful, Anakin-”

“Well, I should be!”

Obi-wan stared at him, watching his Padawan stand up and start slowly pacing, feeling the anger rolling off of him in waves. His eyes were bright with rage, and he had tensed up again. Obi-wan reached into the Force, searching for his Padawan’s Force signature, and reeling back. It had gone black and shot through with maroon, and it looked  _ terrifying. _

“I should’ve been able to save her! I’m the Chosen One, I should be able to save everyone! I want to be able to save  _ everyone _ from death!”

“You cannot-”

“I  _ know _ I can’t, Master! You don’t understand!”

Obi-wan stood up, and he snapped.

“I do not  _ understand? _ Do you really think that when Qui-gon died, I accepted it? You have  _ no idea _ what I went through with his death! I cried for  _ weeks! _ I felt so helpless, I felt so  _ lost _ that I contemplated taking my own life to be with him again. I questioned my ability, I questioned why I couldn’t save him, if I had run faster, if I had tried to cut down Maul earlier, maybe I could have saved him. I questioned every teaching I had drilled into me ever since I had been taken into the Order.”

Silence.

Obi-wan finally blinked, and saw Anakin staring at him as if he were a feral animal. His eyes were wide and glassy, and his bottom lip was slightly wobbling. Obi-wan crossed the room in two steps, drawing Anakin’s tall, shaking form into his arms, feeling his face press against the top of his shoulder as Obi-wan placed his hand on his head and whispered into his ear.

“Tell me everything.”

And Anakin did.

He talked about going to Tatooine, about finding his mother’s new husband and his step-siblings, about how his mother had been taken by Tusken Raiders. He talked about finding the camp, about how she died in his arms, and about what he did afterwards.

“I…I killed them. I killed them  _ all _ .”

Obi-wan ran his fingers through his thin hair as Anakin sobbed into his sleepshirt, his shoulders shaking. He pressed a small kiss to his temple, and when Anakin was done, he looked away, rubbing his eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

“But I…I  _ am _ . I shouldn’t have killed all those…those  _ animals _ . I can’t be a Jedi. I’m going to be expelled from the Order. What if I’m turning bad? What if I’m a bad person? What-”

“Stop.”

Anakin finally made eye contact with him, with wide and red-rimmed eyes, and it hurt Obi-wan’s heart.

“It is okay to  _ feel _ , Anakin. You are more different than anyone else I have ever known in the Jedi Order. You are unique. It would be detrimental to yourself if you could not feel.”

Anakin opened his mouth, an objection on his lips, but Obi-wan shushed him, resting both hands on his cheeks.

“You were old enough to experience emotion for others, for your mother and Qui-gon and myself and countless others. That is why the Jedi did not want to take you, because they knew that would be a violation of our doctrine. But you are the Chosen One, you are  _ different. _ You are  _ not _ a bad person, Anakin. You are a very  _ good _ person, who terrible things have happened to that most people can scarcely imagine. You have light  _ and _ dark inside of you, Anakin. We all do. What matters is what part we choose to act upon.”

Anakin pressed his head back down to his shoulder, his mouth whispering  _ thank you _ across Obi-wan’s neck, and he shuddered.

“Do you need me to sleep with you?”

Anakin silently nodded.

And as the morning sun streaked across the floor and Obi-wan woke up to Anakin curled around him like a vine, slightly snoring as the top of his head was pressed up against his chin, his arms tightly wrapped around his chest and his long legs tangled in his own, Obi-wan smiled.

It was the best sleep either of them had gotten in a very long time.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll try and do the rest of Obikin week, but with school and all I'll probably end up posting my fics later. But I'll try to post one every day for you guys!


End file.
